I'm attracted to my first cousin female as long as I can remember and I currently developed really strong sexual feelings for her. I'm 18 years- old and a very shy and innocent guy, she is 20 very funny and a little bit crazy but I like that. Our families are very close and we kinda grew up together because we saw each other like every two months as kids. I think there has always been a sexual tension between us because she has been tempting me and flirting with me all the time when we were younger. Last year we went on vacation together with our grandparents, my sister and my parents. Me, my sister and my cousin slept together in the same room and my sister shared a bed with my cousin. But at one night I managed to sleep with them in their bed because we watched a movie on my tablet together. Afterwards I turned around to sleep but I realised that she was touching my butt with her face and I still don't know If she was doing that on purpose.
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Is it bad that I’m considering it?
I know she was free at the time but I feel really guilty about it now. They were living together and I thought they were all set to get married. Then she called me and said it was all going wrong. She looked incredible. We were messing about in the water. At first we were splashing around, then she jumped on to my shoulders for a piggy-back. She could see I was really turned on and pretended to pull down my trunks so the whole world could see. She got out too and led me to a cubicle tucked well away at the side. We slipped inside and locked the door, then had wonderful sex that seemed to go on for hours.
I remember it like it was yesterday. I was asleep on the living room couch. My sister came running down stairs screaming. All her screaming had awakened me. I knew exactly what she was talking about. My mother made him go home that night, but he still continued to visit. We all slept in one big room with two king-size beds. One night when I was 9 years old a touch on my hand awakened me.
My parents are out for a month and I'm staying with you," I asked. Well do you wanna stay up? My parents are going on a date, won't be back till tomorrow and my siblings are going to bed at 7pm so we have the sitting room to ourselves! And don't come downstairs unless it's an emergency," I replied shoeing them upstairs. I've never kissed anyone in school before," I admitted. We made the walls and the bed shake, forgetting that everyone downstairs was getting angry from the noise. Since then me and Jake never saw each other again, my parents moved me to a new country and school.